HAPPY NEW YEAR 2014

It has been almost 5 months that I left my blog gathering dust. We have had lots of major and luckily positive changes over the past few months. Tommy has been frequenting the daycare on daily basis. We were all amazed at how quickly and easily he adapted to a new stage of life, lol. He loves going to the daycare everyday and never sheds any tears nor clings to his parents' legs when saying goodbye in the morning. He enjoys every minutes at the daycare and even leads a small group of boys who adore cars to race around the activity center despite the fact that he knows only a handful of English words. The only thing we are not happy about sending Tommy to the daycare is that he still eats nothing there. This lazy guy is so getting used to be spoon-fed that he will not touch any foods by himself unless someone helps him. And he never gets hungry no matter how little he has in his tiny stomach since morning until late afternoon. Consequently Tommy has lost 2.5kg since starting daycare. Our prince is no longer a chubby boy. Instead, we get a skinny one. Besides, Tommy shows little progress in his speech skills. He can speak individual words (mostly English) or repeat even a full sentence either in English or in our native language though. Imagine how adorable he is when he asks you, "Mommy, what are you doing here?" in his cute tone when you are washing dishes and gifts you a kiss.

Mew is currently in Grade 4. She is doing very well at school compared to her classmates, but still far from our expectation, especially in language arts. We are considering changing her school next year or sending her to a tutoring center so that she could advance further academically. Her keyboard lessons have been proving of good value when she now can play Fur Elise after 1 year of learning. But Mew is still very lazy in practising her lessons. We also had to cancel her fine art classes with much regret due to her lack of efforts in practising at home. Her swimming lessons continue though and we hope that she could reach the highest level by the end of next year so that we could be guaranteed to have equipped Mew well with at least an important survival skill.

I have moved out of my snail shell finally and got an administrative job. It suits me well because it does not require me to be sociable while allowing me to take advantage of my analysis and research capabilities. More importantly my office location is very convenient to drop/pick up Tommy daily and the working time is standard. Only two things are still bugging me: remuneration/future prospective of the job and I am soon getting bored with the job because it seems to underutilize my abilities. I still have too much of free time on my hands because I satisfactorily complete all the assigned tasks promptly. I have even tried to ask for more tasks or dig out new tasks without my supervisor's demand to keep myself busy but still, I hate the feeling of having no important project to work on, to think over it, to be challenged and to find solutions to solve problems. Oh, and the worst consequence of my returning to the workforce is that we as the whole family will not be able to visit our country every 2-3 years as before. I could not take 2-month vacation with my current job (or any job honestly) and 2-week visit including return flights is simply too short. What's a dilemna!

Anyhow, another year is knocking on the door just in the next few hours. I hope it will be filled with good health, new hope, love, joys and happiness to all of us.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2014

ONE DAY WHEN YOUR CHILD IS LEAVING FOR UNIVERSITY

I came across an interesting response in the advice column by Amy Dickinson in today's Metro newspaper to the letter of a reader who is mourning an empty nest when her daughter has recently left for college. I think part of it is worth sharing here:
"... This is completely normal. You and your daughter are both experiencing a huge life transition.
Ultimately this will yielded unexpected joys and challenges to both of you. What you must not do is impose your emotional response onto your daughter.
In life, it is the child's job, ultimately, to leave the nest. The parent's burden is to let her leave, and to celebrate her independence in stages..."

GRANDMA'S PEARLS OF WISDOM

I want to share this touching poem by Becky Netherland which was enclosed in a flyer I received long time ago to advertise for the "Grandma's Pearls of Wisdom Pearl Necklace" from the Bradford Exchange fine jewellery.
 

Grandma's Pearls of Wisdom

To My Granddaughter...

I’ve traveled paths you’ve yet to walk
Learned lessons old and new
And now this wisdom of my life
I’m blessed to share with you

Let kindness spread like sunshine
Embrace those who are sad
Respect their dignity, give them joy
And leave them feeling glad

Forgive those who might hurt you
And though you have your pride
Listen closely to their viewpoint
Try to see the other side

Walk softly when you’re angry
Try not to take offense
Invoke your sense of humor
Laughter’s power is immense!

Express what you are feeling
Your beliefs you should uphold
Don’t shy away from what is right
Be courageous and be bold

Keep hope right in your pocket
It will guide you day by day
Take it out when it is needed
When it’s near, you’ll find a way

Remember friends and family
Of which you are a precious part
Love deeply and love truly
Give freely from your heart

The world is far from perfect
There’s conflict and there’s strife
But you still can make a difference
By how you live your life

And so I’m very blessed to know
The wonders you will do
Because you are my granddaughter
And I believe in you 

(©2008 Becky Netherland for The Bradford Group) 

If you want to find nice greetings and poems for your grandma, here is a link for some:

http://www.pic2fly.com/Grandmother+Granddaughter+Quotes.html

TOMMY'S FIRST DAY AT THE DAYCARE

Finally, after 4 short visits to the daycare to help him become familiar with the staff, teachers and friend during the past 2 weeks, today was the first day that Tommy officially joined the preschool group and also the first time ever that Tommy stayed with "strangers". He did it amazingly!

Mommy took Tommy to the daycare a bit late in the morning when all his friends had just come back from outdoor play session for lunch. Since he had been fed a big bowl of shrimp porridge for breakfast and got a cup of milk for morning snack at home with Daddy (while Mommy was completing her important test), Tommy was not hungry, as usual. He however still sat at the table like other friends and sometimes munched a small bit of dry pepperoni or noodle for fun. He drank a small sip from the glass of milk they gave him and this time he did not pour all the milk onto himself like the last time. As Tommy has not been trained to feed himself at home, we do not expect that he could eat a full-size lunch anytime soon but at least he could learn from his classmates.

After lunch, Tommy made a little mess around the potty because his bums seemed to be a bit bigger than the potty itself, lol! At home, he could take off all of his underwear and pants when doing the potty duty so we could avoid this kind of messy accidents.

Then while he was busy with some toys, Mommy said bye bye to him and promised to come back to pick him up after nap (he has not yet been able to grasp the notion of "coming back", "picking up" or "after nap" though). He also said bye to Mommy (just like the way Mommy and him say to each other whenever Mommy "goes shopping"). Mommy then quickly left the daycare and hoped the teachers would help comfort him. Feeling a bit guilty at not staying around to check on him, Mommy came back home and wondered how Tommy would do at the daycare without the presence of Daddy, Mommy or Mew.

Daddy was also worried so he urged Mommy to pick Tommy up before 3pm. When Mommy came to the daycare, the kids had just finished afternoon snack with spaghetti. The teachers told Mommy that Tommy had a great time with them. In fact, he did not cry at all after Mommy left. He was so immersed in playing with new toys. Then he had a sound nap with other children (such a big surprise!). He only cried for a short time when waking up from the nap understandably in a completely unfamiliar environment but soon calmed down and joined with his classmates for the snack. He even ate some spaghetti with the help from Mme. Jannette. When Mommy entered his group's room, he had just finished his potty turn and was washing his hands. He was glad to see Mommy's arrival and led Mommy to his play area to see his playing. As long as Mommy sat near him and he could sometimes glance at Mommy's presence, he was a happy and busy boy with his new toys.

Later, all the children were taken to the activity centre and Tommy enjoyed the cars, trucks and buses and games there so much that he did not want to come home. When Mommy and Tommy finally left the daycare, he said good bye to everybody happily. He did have a great day there undoubtedly! He was such a brave kid and he really surprised all of us. We had expected to have a lot of tears on his first day at the daycare but he turned out to adapt very well. Great job, Tommy!

PORTRAIT OF BEST FRIEND

Since March, the friendship between Mew and Leen has blossomed. They have become BFF at school. Mew drew a portrait of her best friend and was told that Leen's family appreciated it very much.

Wish you both a true and long-lasting friendship. Remember that "a true friendship is a two-way street. That is both people have to work to make a relationship a success. You listen to your friend when she's having a bad day, and she does the same for you." A true friend means a lot:

"- You can be yourself around her. You don't have to try to impress her, or pretend to be someone who you're not

- She makes you feel good about yourself. She doesn't make fun of you or cut you down, or even follow it up with "just kidding".

- She supports you. She encourages you and wants you to succeed.

- She's considerate of your needs. She listens to your problems and tries to cheer you up when you're blue.

- You like who you are when you're with her. A true friend brings out the best in you - because she brings out the real you!"

(extracted from American Girl Publishing's A smart girl's guide to friendship troubles by Patti Kelley Criswell)

A HOT-AIR BALLOON ADVENTURE STORY

Here is the writing instructions in a Grade 3 test that we asked Mew to complete yesterday:
"You see a hot-air balloon and you climb aboard. Write an adventure story telling where you go and what you see in the hot-air balloon."

And our young writer created a quite interesting story below (I kept all of her spelling, grammar and vocabulary mistakes as they were).

"The wind blowed me far away from home. I was to scaird to look down. Finally I peeked down. Not bad! It was beautiful! It was a forest with blue lake going by. It was all zigzag. Then a terrible storm sweped me away. I was terrified but told myself not to panick. I crounched down and hold on tight. I don't dare to open my eyes. It was cold and stormy. Oh no! I didn't know how to land this thing! I looked around the tiny hot-air balloon. I found a pink blanked. I wraped it around me and close my eyes and sleep ... Something warm was on me. Morning! The sun shone bright in the sky. The storm was over - and I knew it. I saw a dot - not far away. A beautiful dove!! "No!" I shouted. Too late. The dove popped my hot-air balloon. Then I went flying off the hot-air balloon!! Boom! I was not dead! I land on my trampoline - wait a minute! I land write in front of my house! What a good adventure I had!"

Nice work done, Mew! You are very creative and good at writing. However, remember to double check your work next time to avoid making silly mistakes. And do not forget to look up the dictionary when you are unsure about a word. You also need to improve your spelling skills - the first step should be to read your books aloud. It would help you pronounce words correctly and memorize frequently used words better.

20 THINGS YOU SHOULD TALK TO YOUR DAUGHTER BEFORE SHE'S GROWN

I came across a very interesting article on IVillage written by Jenna McCarthy entitled "20 Things to Say to Your Daughter Before She's Grown" and thought how great it is!  My tween daughter would definitely need these advice at the threshold of teenage, especially when we are living in the liberal Western society and struggling to embrace our Oriental values and traditional culture. We could not shield her from all the peer pressure, online temptations, celebrity magazines, teen-ery TV dramas, etc. but at least we always strive to equip her with a smart mindset, moral values and a loving heart to live a meaningful and happy life.

And to Mew, last but not least, "You'll hate me some days, but I'll always love you".

20 Things to Say to Your Daughter Before She's Grown

Always speak up, it's only hair and more advice for a daughter that all girls should hear

By Jenna McCarthy - June 2, 2013

Here are 20 girl-centric things I want them to know.
1. Learn the word NO. Sure, I don’t like it one bit when you say it to me, but in the big, scary world out there you will be faced with endless tough choices. From boys to beers to inappropriate Instagram photos, potential trouble will lurk everywhere you go. You know that little voice you have inside, the one that tells you something doesn't feel right? Listen to it. Respect it. And most importantly, use it to say NO. It won't be easy a lot of the time, but I assure you, you’ll almost always be glad you did. 
2. Spend more time worrying about how beautiful you are inside than outside. It's fine to take pride in your appearance and want to be pretty. But if how you look is all you care about, you'll pay for it down the road. Yes, you are beautiful -- magnificently, achingly so -- but never forget that you didn't do anything to create or even deserve that. True beauty comes from being kind and thoughtful and compassionate. If you're ugly on the inside, you're ugly. Period.
3. Stuff won't make you happy. Oh, in the moment -- when you're pining for that headband/skateboard/Fijit Friend/designer purse -- you will truly, madly, passionately believe that they will. But things break. We lose them. They run out. They go out of style. They become uncool (the worst!). Happiness comes from appreciating the things you do have, not acquiring more.
4. Some girls are mean girls. Be extremely careful when you choose your friends. At the risk of throwing our entire gender under the bus, girls can be nasty and petty and jealous and cruel. Some of them will lie to you or pretend to be your friend or stab you in the back, and it will hurt like hell every single time. If you're totally unprepared for it, it will crush you even more.
5. Girlfriends will save your life. Yes, girls can be awful, so when you find a loyal, true friend, hold onto her for dear life, and do your best to be loyal and true right back. Boys will come and go, but a good girlfriend will be your steady through the peaks, the valleys and everything in between.
6. Don't judge people (but know that you will be judged). It's a catch-22, kid: I've taught you not to assume things about people simply by the way they look or the clothes they wear; unfortunately the rest of the world won't always do the same. Remember that when you want to bare your belly or pierce your tongue or dye your hair blue. (This may not matter much to you now, but wait until you're trying to get a job or meeting your first boyfriend's -- or girlfriend's -- parents.)
7. Boobs are overrated. Until you have them, you're going to want them. When you get them, you'll obsess about them. Are they big enough? Too big? Is one bigger than the other? (Yes, it probably is. Every breast on the planet is different, even the two sharing the same bra. Accept it and get over it.) No matter how you feel about your boobs, remember that they're not called "private parts" for nothing. So do yourself (and me!) a favor and cover them up. Nothing you could ever do screams I NEED ATTENTION like putting your perky young rack on display.
8. Get to know your grandma. Sure you love your granny, but have you taken time to really talk to her? Grandma's had a lifetime of experience being a woman, and it would be a waste to not tap into her wisdom. Ask her about what it was like growing up, the first boy she liked, how she knew what she wanted to be when she grew up. It's sad but true: She won't be around forever, so make sure you get to know her while you still can.
9. High school is not real life. It feels like there's so much at stake, with cool girls you're desperate to befriend and boys you're crushing on so hard you can't imagine ever meeting anyone better. But trust me: Life gets so much bigger when you go to college and then out into the world. And what someone is like in high school is little indication of who they become as an adult. The popular kids? They might peak as a teenager while some of the kids who don't fit in go on to achieve great things. It's impossible to have that perspective when you're in it, but please trust me and believe these words when it seems like your world is ending.
10. Love yourself first. Not everyone is going to like you and that's okay. Women often are obsessed with getting approval from everyone, but here's the thing: It's impossible to please everyone. The only person who absolutely must like you is, well, you. As long as you can look at the chick in the mirror and know you're making the decisions that are right for her, even if they displease someone else, you can't go wrong.
11. It's okay to wait. The other kids are rounding the bases, while you're not even sure what the bases are. That feeling of overwhelmed discomfort with the whole thing is telling you you're not ready. You'll get there someday, and there's no reason to rush. Hardly anyone ever regrets taking things slow, while a lot of girls do have remorse over rushing.
12. Sex should be fun. You shouldn't be in any rush to have sex, but when you do feel totally ready to do the deed, remember it's supposed to be fun -- really fun. If your partner doesn't care about making you feel good, both emotionally and physically, or you don't know enough about your own body to lead him in the right direction, see #11.
13. Not every problem is the end of the world. Remember that book I used to read you, The Boy Who Cried Wolf? That lesson applies to pretty much everything you do for the rest of your life. If every dilemma or disappointment you face is a 10 on the Drama Scale, you won't get much sympathy from me (or anyone else). It will take you a while to develop full-fledged perspective; in the interim, play the "will this matter in five minutes/days/years?" game before you freak out about something that feels major in the moment.
14. Don't compare yourself to others. You may not want to hear this, but there will always be someone prettier, richer and more popular or talented or athletic or artistic than you are. Don't assume her life is better or happier than yours because of it. Life isn't a competition, it's a journey. You're here to work on being the best you can be.
15. It's only hair. Seriously. You will curl it and straighten it and pull it back and pin it up. You'll wish it were thicker or longer or wavier or straighter. You'll braid it and twist it and color it (please, not pink). You'll spend untold hours counting your split ends. And for what? It's hair. Life is too precious to waste so much time on the pursuit of mane perfection. Put a baseball cap on it, and go out and have some fun.
16. Being smart is cool. Sometimes you may feel as if you have to hide that you're smart. Listen closely to me when I tell you: You don't. Don't ever dumb yourself down because you think it'll make you seem cooler or to try to impress a guy. There may be a window of time when your peers genuinely think that brains are for dorks, but it's a very small window, I promise. If you choose to use your brain, I promise you those dingbats will be drooling over how cool and successful you are.
17. Don't lose yourself in a guy. The goal of dating is to find a guy you like just as he is and who likes you just as you are. Don't pretend to love wind-surfing or scary movies just because he does, or act like you don't love the clarinet because he thinks it's lame. There are plenty of boys out there who will love and admire every last quirky thing about you. Hold out for one of them.
18. Speak up. I'm not talking about complaining or boasting or trying to get your way... but if you have an opinion or you aren't being treated fairly or you see something happening that you know isn't okay, it's your right and your obligation to open your mouth. You may annoy some people when you do or even impress them. Either way, it's okay. The more often you stand your ground, the sooner it will become second nature.
19. You have power over boys. At some point, it will hit you: You are the reason he stumbles over his words and gets sweaty palms. It's a pretty heady feeling to realize you're in possession of feminine wiles, isn't it? But with great power comes great responsibility, so make sure you are always gentle and never cruel. After all, boys can have their hearts broken, too.
20. You'll hate me some days, but I'll always love you. I hope you know enough not to say it to my face, but I accept the fact that there will be moments you feel like you detest me. All daughters think their mothers just don't/couldn't possibly/will never ever get it at some point. But even if you hate me -- even if you tell me so -- I am still there for you. If you need a ride home from a crazy party, advice on a guy problem or just a good cry, I'm your girl.

Jenna McCarthy is an internationally published writer, TED speaker and the author of five books including If It Was Easy They'd Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon: Living with and Loving the TV-Addicted, Sex-Obsessed, Not-so-handy Man You Married (Berkley Books, 2011). Find her at JennaMcCarthy.com.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

I am the happiest Mother in the world! Take a look at the special Mother's Day gift Mew made by herself for me. So impressive, so lovely and so thoughtful! We are all amazed at the notes she writes in French because they are not only very well-versed but also perfect in grammar and spelling. I am so proud of my daughter!

She knows that I am "smart" and good at Word Search game so she makes a word puzzle for me:

Mew is learning about Haiku poems at school so she attempts to make one for me:

These notes will definitely make all mothers' hearts melt:

And the last gift, one-of-a kind, very personalized and touching. Mew has seen Mommy clipping coupons for years and now it's her turn to hand me the most invaluable coupons ever:

Ma cherie, ma cocotte, thank you so much from the bottom of my heart! Mommy has never been a wonderful maman but Mommy just wants you to know that EVERYTHING I DO, I DO IT FOR YOU! Love you xxx!

MEW'S GALLERY OF ART WORKS

Mew has been creating lots of artworks and all of them are beautiful. We decide to convert our home into an "art gallery" so that her fruits of art passion could be displayed prominently all over the walls. Most are drawings or paintings. Some are paper collages. Others are creations shaped by Bendaroos building sticks.

Check out some of her works:

TOMMY'S WEEKLY TRIP TO LIBRARY

 Now that Tommy has turned 2, he could join the Time for Twos club at Downtown Public Library every Wednesday morning for some storytelling, rhymes, and social interactions.

Look at his excitement in discovering shelves of books in the Children's department:

 

Tommy is not a big fan of books, yet he picked up a hardcover book from the shelf right away: